Being able to talk to your partner in any situation is often seen as the key to a happy, long-lasting relationship but it’s not always so simple. Infertility is one topic that couples find difficult to openly discuss.
Pregnancy is often labelled as one of the happiest and most exciting times in a couple’s life, but this is not always the case. The NHS reported that one in seven couples have difficulty conceiving, equalling to around 3.5 million people just in the UK. Infertility can put a strain on your relationship, but it’s important that you work through this difficult time together.
Try some of our tips to help make talking to your partner a little easier…
● Avoid blame
Whether you put the blame on yourself or your partner, it will make the situation even worse. Try to understand that infertility cannot be controlled and therefore the blame should not be planted on either of you.
● Don’t forget about your relationship
Although this may sound odd, a lot of couples find themselves putting their relationship on the back burner. It’s easy for your focus to shift to all things baby-related.
● Make sure you ask how they feel
Sometime it’s easy to forget that you aren’t going through this alone. Your partner may need your support the same way you need theirs. Ask them how they are and let them know that you’re there to listen if they need you.
● Have you discussed each individual decisions or topics together?
Hearing the news that you are infertile triggers a whole whirlwind of emotions and your brain will most likely go into overdrive. Sit down together and write down a list of all the questions you may have and any decisions you may need to face. A few examples include:
- Who do you want to tell?
- Will you join support groups?
- When will you say enough is enough and make the decision to stop trying?
- Do you have the finances to consider fertility treatment?
● Distract and reward yourself
Whether that is nice food, walks, yoga, a holiday or just sat at home binge-watching your favourite shows. Understand that both of you will have different pressures and you will need to lean on each other once in a while.
Ultimately, whilst going through this difficult time you need to remember that you aren’t alone. Here at The Hewitt Fertility Centre, we offer help to make your infertility journey that little bit easier, from independent experienced counselling and peer group support to cost calculators for different types of treatments.
